I was in a little bit of a funk yesterday. I know what the problem is. I'm not accomplishing enough. I'm doing great on my training for the HM, though I'm not spending as much time on my bike as I'd like, and I'm getting to the gym and pool more regularly (though it's play time with Junior and not much actual swimming). That's pretty much all I'm doing, though.
I am not cut out to be a stay at home mom. I love to be at home, but I'm not good at it. I need a job to structure my life around. I lack discipline. So our house is messy, and while I'm with Jr. all day long (ALL DAY LONG), it's not quality time. So I feel guilty. And because I'm not keeping him busy enough, he's making me crazy. Between the guilt and energetic kid, I've been super crabby.
I know what to do about it all. Get him moving. Do some cleaning. Go to bed on time so that I can get up in the mornings. I feel much happier in a clean(er) house. Play with my son. You can never play with this boy to his heart's content, but if I know I've actually spent good time with him, his guilt trip (and Jewish mothers have NOTHING on my boy) won't bother me.
We did go to the pool yesterday, where he continues his fish-like ways. Every time we go, he wants to take the deep water test. They have to swim two widths of the pool. Yesterday, he basically swam one width of the pool before asking to take the test. He was tired when he finished! I was really proud of him. Just watching him swim, though, shows me how much he needs to get back to lessons. He has no form, and I know his swimming would be so much more efficient with lessons. I'm going to try hard to fit that in once school starts. We won't be working around football practice this year, and club practices won't start until late September, so we should at least be able to fit in ONE session of lessons.
We also had round two of learning to ride a two-wheeler. Jr. isn't super motivated. The only way I got him out there yesterday was because he'd started watching a video before supper, and I told him he couldn't watch the rest until he'd practiced riding his bike. Not much success once again. I think he may have managed 3-4 seconds of unassisted riding. After a bit, my husband came out to watch and was encouraging him. Junior told him, "Mommy will never give up on me...you know, because of the swimming thing."
After the above incident, I told him that, after that, I knew he could do anything if he tried. And he took that to heart. So maybe I've done something right this summer. Even if it was only one comment.
EDIT: So, after doing my whining this morning, I went and did something about it. Junior and I practiced soccer and did session 3 of "how to ride a bike". Soccer was fine, and he managed 2 7-second intervals on the bike without help. Progress.
Forgot to get a bike pic. Oops. Maybe next time.
We made banana bread and chocolate chip cookies (both darn good, if I do say so myself!) and then hit the pool after lunch. I swam 3 laps today...amazing how out of breath it makes you!! The last 25 yards were on my back. Whew. After the pool, we ran by the local bike shop to pick up our race t-shirts and numbers for Mud Mountain tomorrow. I'm excited! It's been since the 3rd since I had a race, and even though I don't have much chance of placing even in my age group, there's something about a race...
Feeling a little better now.
Bike: 12.44 miles
Gym: 80 min. elliptical; strength: 2x arms, 1x legs
Swimming: 250yards (100, 150)